You know I have only ever missed one flight ever in all the times I have flown and with all the places I have been. But it wasn’t going to be this one, not a chance.
The one I did manage to miss was at Atlanta airport though. You learn fast not to leave it too late as the traffic can just stop dead for almost any reason at all. Think the cars just get tired sometimes. I believe of all the people in the US the good folks of Atlanta spend the most on commuting. It might also have something to do with the size of their vehicles. They do like their oversized or extended or special limited edition big rigs. I say this out of envy as I had settled for an 8 seater SUV a long time ago which seemed perfectly adequate for Judi and I. You have to have the third row of seats just in case (we did actually use them once but just once).
Anyway I am supposed to be talking about my flight to Moscow. Ok Arrived 1:30 for a 4pm flight not bad timing. Drag literally 1 Large case, 1 small case, one suit carrier and one Backpack across to the check in desk.
“Where’s you goin” hollers the “Customer Service Rep” and whilst the badge clearly states “I’m here to help” I can only assume from her tone that it’s someone else’s coat she has on. Now given I am 1/3 of the way down the International check in line I would have hoped it would be kind of obvious. Anyway I feign not to understand what she is saying as if I don’t comprehend the language and soon she gets bored and looks for another person to “help”.
Ok no panic lots of time however I have some doubts about the large case. Those plastic bags you fill and suck the air out of are really good but the downside is that you can fit a lot more into a case hence the dead weight I am lugging around. So will I get pinged for excessive baggage?. Well no, the nice girl checks my nice shiny new visa and my local address (not sure why but they always do) asks how many bags I say two and whilst we are waiting for the guy at the counter next to me to get his off the scale she prints the tags off so I am home free. Fill with mild success I also blag two carry on tags for my small case and backpack. No stopping me now. Off to the scanners. In the background I hear the now familiar “Where’s you goin” which at the world busiest Airport seems to be an unimaginative question. I wonder if anyone has ever said “to get some milk”.
Ok so this bit is a little self indulgent. There I am at the scanner with Nobody in front and Nobody behind…………so how many plastic trays can I use, 1) Jacket, 2) small bottles in clear plastic container,3) jacket, 4) Pc (My present to myself), 5) shoes 6) belt, 7) for my glasses.
Ladies and gentlemen a new personal best.
Now in my defense in a queue I only use 2 but hey it’s my time. The “security representative” checks my ticket and waves me through and now feeling slightly guilty I stack all of the trays back on the roller so they can wheel them back to the beginning.
So now check my stock of food for the journey. Peanuts, 3 $0.99 bags, a KitKat and a bag dark chocolate M&M’s, ready for anything. Off to the boarding gate E2 as far as you can go without being on the runway. Not a problem plenty of time. I know from experience I have to hand over my I-94 so as I amble up to the gate the guy picks up the microphone and asks anyone who is travelling without a Russian passport to report to the gate. Fine I am already there so not a problem. He takes my passport, ticket, I-94 says they have changed the plan and do I still want the Exit row, “you bet I do” 10 hours on a flight you want as much room as you can.
Anyway that done I think I will go and get acoffee. turn around and see what is at least 30 people behind me so the luck is still with me. I know boarding for this type of flight will be 40 minutes before takeoff so getting my timing right is critical. Once again I arrive back at the gate just as they finish loading first class and walk straight through on my Zone 2 boarding Breezeway pass. I pass what is still the remnants of the queue of none Russian Passport holders.
Get myself settled until the guy who arrives in a sweat to take the seat behind me is telling anyone who will listen that he will rip the airline a new one as not only did they cancel his earlier flight but as the changed the plan he is no longer in his favorite exit row.
At this point I turn up the volume on my iPod and settle in for a nice flight.